Saturday, May 14, 2011

A New Beginning

For those of you who may not have heard, my husband was offered a new job a week ago. He started this last Tuesday and he has really enjoyed it and thinks it will be a great company to work for. They are very up and coming and have a great incentives, insurance, and tuition re-imbursement. We are beyond thrilled and it actually doesn't seem very real to me quite yet.

Losing Andy's job was a huge shock to me and we weren't quite sure what to do. It was a long 2 months of confusion, doubt, questioning, and hardships. That being said, we are incredibly blessed and I feel very undeserving of what has been given to us. I had a very bad attitude during Andy's 2 months of unemployment. I was ornery all the time and I picked fights for no reason. I had a hard time having Andy at home and I just wasn't myself. We talked about it often and Andy was so understanding and loving and I am just so grateful for him and his great attitude. He pulled us through even though I'm sure it was difficult for him. He was always positive, which helped me to know that everything would work out okay. It's just so hard to understand that everything will happen on the Lord's timetable, no matter how much we beg for things to be different.

My mom and I had many conversations over the phone and she must have listened to me say the same things over and over at least 20 times. Yet, she was always so understanding and loving anyway. She also sent me a book that I loved called When Your Prayers Seem Unanswered. It was terrific and I highly recommend it.

On top of that, so many friends, ward members, and family gave us so much love and support. Everyone really rallied around us at this challenging time and helped us in more ways than I can describe. Whether it was sympathy, understanding, or a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on, everyone gave us the help we needed.

After it was all said and done, I felt very undeserving because of my bad attitude through the whole thing. I kept wondering what I was supposed to learn from it all and I know I pulled away from my Heavenly Father. And yet, he continues to bless me, His ungrateful daughter. I love Him so much and it helped me realize that, as a parent, no matter how stubborn my kids are and no matter how much they frustrate me, I still want the best for them and I am pleased when they learn and grow. Such is the way I can only imagine my Heavenly Father feels about us while we are upon this earth. I have so much to learn still. I had a lot of repenting to do and I hope for my sake that I learned what I was supposed to learn as well as some patience along the way.

Another thing I am grateful for is the gift of the Holy Ghost. I had a dream a few weeks before the interview process began that we would have a very difficult choice between 2 jobs and I woke up and told Andy about it. He said, "I would be happy to have that problem rather than the problem of being unemployed!" and I agreed. Well, within a few days, 2 companies contacted him and requested interviews. After the first one, they both requested 2nd interviews. Shortly after that, one of the companies offered a job and a starting date, while the other one wanted another interview to be scheduled the day Andy was supposed to start the other job. Long story short, we had to make a very quick decision. Both companies were great, but very different jobs. We had no idea what would be best for our family and we had to make a decision fast. We literally felt the Holy Ghost at work and we felt very good about our decision to go with the company that we did. It is here in VA, only about 1/2 hour away and we will be signing another year lease on our house. We felt like we should stay here even though a lot of people wanted us to go home (to Utah) and wondered why we weren't. It all just worked out perfectly, we feel like we are where we belong right now, and I couldn't feel more blessed.

Life isn't perfect and I hate when people pretend that it is. I am grateful for my trials and how much I learn and grow, and how much closer I draw to my Father in Heaven. I am grateful for another chance and new opportunities. I am grateful I can share my learning experiences with others, and also for the people I have in my life.

Thanks for being some of those people :)


Mrs.Spy said...

Oh Sarah, I love you!
remember even Lehi's wife grumbled during their time in the wilderness, but she still chose to do what was right, even though she didn't like it. Taking those steps and moving forward matter so much when we are tried and tested. You may not see it, but you have passed a major test in your life and the Lord and those who know you are so proud of you. You are an amazing woman and you are worthy of every blessing you have and more, Sarah.

Sarah said...

Sarah, I totally agree with you about people pretending life is perfect when it isn't. It's almost like they're bragging? Am I just being cynical?? Probably. We love you and miss you!!! I love to read your blog about your cute family!

Melanie said...

Oh my goodness Sarah. I am way behind on your blog. So thrilled for you that Andy has a job that he is liking and that you get to stay in VA!